"Then the master called the servant in. 'You wicked servant,'
he said, 'I canceled all that debt of yours because
you begged me to.Shouldn't you have had mercy on your
fellow servant just as I had on you?'
In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured,
until he should pay back all he owed.
"This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you
unless you forgive your brother from your heart."
Matthew 18:32-35 (NIV)
“They will never hurt me again! From now on, I have no expectations of them. With no expectations nothing they do will hurt me ever again!”
I’ll never forget saying those words. They were said after being hurt to the core of my being by someone that I trusted and I was full of anger, bitterness and had an unforgiving heart. They hadn’t asked for forgiveness and I wasn’t going to offer it. This went on for years until I realized that every day I woke up the situation that had hurt me so deeply kept creeping into my day and continued to bring me down. Every day that I chose not to forgive I was in bondage, in chains, enslaved by the one who had wronged me. I continued to justify my unforgiving heart because they had not confessed their sin and apologized to me. They had not sought my forgiveness so I rationalized that I didn’t have to offer it. The longer I thought like that, the heavier the chains became.
In a loving, gentle yet firm way, Father God had me read and re-read the passage above and after reading chapter 18 I continued to read into chapter 19 where it talks about divorce. All of a sudden I was struck with the placement of this passage. God doesn’t make mistakes and while talking to someone about their pending divorce I was convicted right in my tracks of my sin. I began to discuss my friend’s situation with them and said, “You know, this passage in chapter 19 is not there by mistake. If God can forgive you like he did the servant, how can you not forgive your spouse of what they’ve done to you? In comparison you’ve been forgiven of a much greater offense.” Then it hit me, I was doing the same thing. God then took me on a journey of all that He’d forgiven me of. Through the tears I repented and asked God’s forgiveness and then did one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done, I offered forgiveness to those who had hurt me. Not because it was easy, but because in light of what my Master has pardoned me from, how could I not. I saw myself as the ungrateful servant in chapter 18 and I didn’t want to face my Lord and have him say to me the words above.
Forgiveness should not be an option when we realize what we’ve been pardoned of. It pleases God by our obedience and it releases us once again be able to give and receive.
My friend, freedom for you today might come in the heart-felt phrase, “I forgive you.” May it be so, by the power and grace from the One who has said the same to you and me (many times).
1 comment:
Thank you Mark so much for your comments. It reminds me of Corrie ten Boom, the Dutch Christian writer and evangelist, who was with her sister Betsy, imprisoned by the Nazis in Ravensbruch concentration camp, because they hid Jews. Her sister died of starvation, and Corrie just survived. After the war, Corrie preached for many years, especially on forgiveness. One day after a meeting a man came up to her, and she froze. Corrie realised he was the one of the cruel guards at the camp. He put his hand out to Corrie and just said "Sorry". Corrie just could not shake it and walked away. Then she realised that forgiveness was not truly in her heart. Corrie had not dealt with the hurt she had buried deep in her heart. Corrie thought, like you Mark, about what Jesus had done and went back and found the man and shook his hand and realised that finally she had been set free.
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